A child is a father..

A small world we live in. Everyone is busy in their life.. we wake up, go to work, eat food and sleep, - everyday the same story. Sometimes we take leave, we go to some movies or enjoy with friends. Holidays are our favorite days to celebrate life, we miss it everyday..
Some people are married, some are in love,.. some are single. I was married (now divorced), and have two kids, but they don't live with me. You enjoy with your love or wife or husband, I enjoy alone with myself, .. I watch some movies, listen to music, eat food, sleep and miss myself there in my life. My story is like that, a little sad. It was not like this always..

I think of those happy days, when you were with me..
Now I do miss those days, I miss you in my life. I miss the days when we were together. I miss the life when we were so closed. We used to talk to each-other and laugh so hard. I know I always was irritating and annoying, but you always listened to me. Sometimes you were busy working in your office, I was not working that time, I did irritate you and behaved a little crazy.

Life was so beautiful that time, we used to play together. You were like a big brother to me, you supported me in every situation. You were like my friend, listened to my so many stupid ideas.. But I didn't listen to you, when you were talking about getting a job and being serious about life. I didn't listen to you, I really wasted so many days of my life..
Whatever the situation it was, you always were there for me. You were there for me, when my friends bullied me because of my fat body. You were there for me with me, when I cried and studied the whole night before exam. I was not that good in my studies, you were who always believed me.

Sometimes you too behaved like a kid, but I was a kid that time - a stupid kid. Then I got job and move to a different city far from our place, we used to talk on the phone. You called me everyday, we used to talk (a little talk, i know). Then that day I told you to not call everyday and not to call me, I will call you weekly. You listened to me, you didn't call for some -- days. I was busy for some weeks and didn't call you, I saw your missed calls but ignored to call, thinking of having the same boring talks always. I know that you were probably mad at me, but never said to me anything about it. Always you were like this, never shared anything about your struggles, your hard-works you did in life.

Now I do think about all that, I remember you. Now I understand you, who you really are in my life. What you meant and what you told, I understand all this today. Now as I am thinking about you, I am crying, thinking how I behaved in life to you, my dad, my papa, my friend, my philosopher, my guide, my support and my everything. I understand all this because I am a father now, that you know - But a terrible father i am, that you don't know.

Now I am in your shoes, a father - now I understood the meaning "A child is a father too". I am coming to your place dad, to make a fresh start for our relationship and learn about life and fatherhood. And to say that I love you <3, dad.